NOW…HERE IS A THING-Rhodesia, South Africa, Zimbabwe

Nigel Henson

Greetings All,

Allow me to introduce myself…Nigel Henson is the name I am usually called by…as is common, I have been known by many others, not all flattering, but let us not indulge in the indelicate. It is possible that you may have heard of me, and less than possible that we have met, for I fear that experience is one you would not wish to repeat.

By sheer persistence , I have prevailed, cajoled, threatened and finally, on the point of total exhaustion, persuaded Hannes Wessels to include my meagre contribution in his most esteemed weekly blog” Africa Unauthorised” …an undertaking that has left me perspiring, and looking forward to quaffing something that has a kick. So, for better or worse, here I am.

And now that I am in your face, what do I intend to do?

Now…. here’s a thing.

I am far too unworldly to comment, or pass opinion on the matters that your esteemed team eloquently, and with some precision illuminate our lives on, on a weekly basis about the weighty affairs that are part of our daily being. Rather, I thought, try some light entertainment, mixed now and then with a grain of truth, and the odd porky pie. Here, you will be appalled, frightened, disgusted, and enthralled by fragments of stuff that no editor in his right mind would ever dream of publishing. Got it? I am here for as long as Hannes and yourselves can endure.

Now… here’s a thing.

I am one of many thousands of Zimbabwean diasporas living in South Africa. My family and I came to South Africa at the end of the bush war. It was a difficult exercise to uproot oneself: for more years than I care to remember, I had been a part of the military, in both in Rhodesia, and in Oman. During this period, I had risen unsteadily through officered ranks to the point where our insurgent enemies (and in some cases, my friends!), viewed me as being a human they would prefer to have residing under an oak tree, sleeping soundly, with a cross marking the spot. Emerging unscathed from a number of awkward spots was due to my wonderful soldiers, and the assistance of an Airforce, whose war record has yet to be equaled, I left the military, much to the relief of those senior to myself.

A great number of my fellow soldiers as well as others of like-mind took the view that continued life in the land of our birth would become intolerable under the changed regime. So, for those of us that chose this path, how has life treated us? Are we still comfortable with the decisions we made nearly fifty years ago? Of course, most of us were ill equipped for a life in the mainstream of South Africa’s economic thoroughfare; in common with most others, I found the operation of a simple arithmetic calculator a frightfully difficult operation; this was eased somewhat when to my delight, I managed to insert the battery. So, muddle through we did, and with a sigh, eventually retired. As with most of us who view one’s lives as being a series of great achievements, I even had the gall to write and have published my memoirs, taken seriously only by myself.

The South Africa we immigrated to is no more. The country has changed beyond all recognition. Gone forever are the expectations, the values, the norms, the institutions, the corporates and the way of life that greeted us upon our arrival. Today, all the never-ending chatter is about how standards have slipped, how corruption is our daily bread, how we slip on sewerage in the streets-a feast of bad news that feeds upon itself, almost to the point of vitriol.

And yet-here’s a thing.

Is sleepy Joe Biden’s America the same place as it was when our genial Ronny was President? Is Sunak’s Britain the same place as it was under the jackboot of Lady Scratcher? Russia today is hardly the same place as it was under Boozy Boris Yeltsin, nor is Macron’s France unchanged since the days of Arch Shagger Valery Giscard d ‘Estaing.

And Australia? Strewth, God only knows, for all good Aussie blokes cannot even recall the name of their current PM. When they really apply their minds, Smiley and Blue fondly recall “ that Sheila Prime Minister-what’s her name-Julia?”: Australia’s first lady Prime Minister (all decent Aussie blokes think male politicians bowl from the side-screen end); PM Julia who had a penchant for keeping her squeeze under her Prime Ministerial desk, and, when of a mind to, dragging him out by his what-nots for a spot of light sex, down by the billabong (and under the shade of a coolabah tree.)

Of course, none of the nations listed above are the same; they are very different places from those of you who in your dotage term as ‘the good ole days’.

So why should South Africa be any different? We have no right to be.

So, the following letters in this series are really to record for now (things will change tomorrow) in no particular order a journey through the land we came to, so long ago.

Has our rainbow faded, for we are the rainbow nation, are we not? I’m sure when this series concludes, you will be none the wiser.

Now…there’s a thing.

See you next week.

Nigel Henson was born in Bulawayo. Rhodesia in 1946.After his attendance at Plumtree School, he joined the Regular Rhodesian Army in 1965, and was awarded the Sword of Honor at his Officer Commissioning Ceremony in that year.
He would serve as Junior Troop officer, Staff Officer and Training Officer in various capacities from 1965 to 1977, including sabbatical service in Oman .
He was appointed as OC Support Commando in the RLI in 1977 and would serve in that capacity until the end of the Bush War in 1980. He was decorated in 1980 and was sent to SA Military Academy for a period, before retiring from the Army later that year.
Since then, he has held senior positions in various SA Corporates, , finally retiring in 2014
Henson enjoys fly-fishing, golf , and writing in his spare time. His Memoirs ” From Soup to Nuts” was published in 2022.He spends his time between Gauteng and Dullstroom, in Mpumalanga

Description
A lifetime in a book … from schooling in Rhodesia to fighting as the country’s longest serving Fire – Force Commander during the bush-war of the 1970’s
Nigel Henson was born in Bulawayo, Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe) in 1946, and educated at Plumtree School. He was awarded the Sword of Honor at the School of Infantry and was commissioned into the Rhodesian Light Infantry, serving as a troop commander in the Bush War of the 1970s.He moved to the Middle East to join the Sultan of Oman’s Armed Forces as a company commander in Dhofar in1968/9 at the age of 21, before returning to the RLI as a training officer, rising to staff officer in army headquarters.
In May 1977, Major Nigel Henson took command of the Support Commando engaged in Fire-Force operations, most of which he commanded from the air and involved parachuting into Mozambique and Zambia.
In early 1980, Henson, along with other officers and soldiers, was decorated at Army Headquarters Salisbury after the Commonwealth Monitoring Force had arrived. Now retired, Nigel lives in Gauteng. He relishes his fly-fishing, his love of fine whiskeys, and the occasional poor game of golf.

‘‘…Major Henson has acted as the airborne controller and has been subjected to considerable ground fire from the enemy. In spite of this, Major Henson’s tactical handling of his troops
on the ground, and his determined leadership have been of the highest order…’’ – Legion of Merit: Military” (OLM) awarded at Special Awards Ceremony: April 1980

source:https://africaunauthorised.com/nowhere-is-a-thing/

Natalie